Cancer Complications, Cb Style

Following yesterday’s insight into the emotional side of Cb – and thanks for the many varied bits of feedback I got – I thought we’d delve a bit into the physical today…

I think when most people think of problems post cancer they think of things like recurrence, secondary cancers from treatment, emotional / mental issues, etc.  I get my own form of “fun” now 14+ years down the road in the form of abdominal surgery, and round four is coming up.

Back in November 1996 I chose to have a dramatic surgery called an RPLND (actually the name is much longer but not a need to know).  While the link has the details, you can try performing one at home simply by purchasing a fresh, intact (preferably dead) fish.  Carefully gut it, then once all the insides are out, put it all back together and sew it up nice.  Voila!  RPLND, sans the whole remove lymph nodes off interior back muscle wall, but you’ll get the gist.

All actually went very well for many years post op, but then a few years ago I had a hernia over the incision site.  My doc explained that because the RPLND had required such extensive suturing in the ab muscle walls, over time and effort it had simply failed.  Off to the operating table I went.  Back in September of 2010, another area failed and another hernia op was in the cards.  Only this time, due to so much cutting and pasting, a seroma had formed after, and then happily ruptured and wouldn’t heal completely. 

So in the next week or so, it’s back to the operating table again for a little walk in / limp out, hope you enjoy the pain meds(!) and THIS time we think we’ll finally have it figured out.  It’s not only the physical pain in the gut that’s making me think, it’s thanking my fortunate stars for the medical insurance I have or else I’d be tens of thousands of dollars in debt as well.

At the end of the day / this blog I hope the point that comes across is not “poor Chris” but rather a little more insight into life as a cancer survivor.  We have a closing line in our Manifesto that reads, “Cancer may leave your body, but it never leaves your life.”  No lie there – ciao for now – Cb…

PS - if you haven't watched the LIVESTRONG Manifesto video in the link above in a while, check it out below for the new international version.  Yep, I'm the shave your head guy, but also an amazing hand model, too! (grin)  Def one of the best projects I've ever been a part of....

Single, by Choice?

I’ll admit that being single at 48 years young is not something I had ever envisioned, quite the opposite in fact.  But life gives you different scenarios on a daily basis, it is what it is, and trust me: there are worse places to be single than Austin, Texas…  with so much to offer from an active, vibrant community it’s easy to jump into the life of happy hours, live music, athletic events, and long walks / run on the trails, literally surrounded by like minded attractive people.  (Unofficial motto of Austin residents: don’t come visit, you’ll want to live here…)

But yesterday I was unexpectedly confronted with a couple of higher questions: i.e. why am I single and what am I going to do with it?

Spoiler alert: I am not looking for a relationship…

So what happened?  I (virtually) met someone that had amazing qualities, like minded values, and has her act seemingly quite together.  Yes, I know that could all be a smoke screen, and while I really doubt it in this case, regardless it’s not even the point.  The point being: I found myself thinking about a relationship, and what that might look like, and what was it in life that I really wanted; and I also found myself thinking about the advantages and disadvantages of life as a single person – there are many on both sides of the coin.  I discussed it with a good friend who’s been in a similar circumstance and she also admitted to feelings along this way.  It’s an interesting conundrum to be sure…

I do know I hope that one day I'll find someone who I can commit to and hopefully grow old with.  In the mean time there’s a lot of good life to be had here and around the world.  But it’s also good to know that the clouds are starting to lift a little and thoughts of beyond next week or next month are creeping back in.  No  idea where this is all headed, but isn’t that the point: it’s the journey, not necessarily the destination?  Ciao for now – Cb…